Funny Doberman Shirts

Looks like security. Acts like a couch blanket.

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Worn, not posed

Relaxed, not baggy

The washed tee runs roomy with a straight fall. The soft tee keeps a classic fit. Both are true to size.

Size guide

Other dogs

The Doberman Pinscher was developed in Germany in the 1890s by Louis Dobermann, a tax collector who wanted a dog that could keep him company on his rounds. The result was sleek, athletic and alert, and it has looked like a professional bodyguard ever since. Anyone who lives with one knows the joke: the dog that strangers cross the street to avoid is the same dog that leans its full weight on your legs, follows you from room to room and wants to be under the blanket with you.

This collection is Doberman humor in that spirit, with a lot more deadpan than slapstick, all original illustrations. The reputation gap: "Both Sides Calm," "Soft Against Hard" and "Need No Pedestal," for a dog that already looks like a statue. The energy: "There Is No Off Switch" and "Pin Nothing Down," with a giant staple that fails to hold the dog. The walk: "Heavy Duty," where the leash hardware is bigger than the person holding it. The pride: "A Cut Above," "Make Room First" and "Elevate the Everyday," a Doberman on the top step of a podium. And the art history department, where Dobermans take over the classics: "Night Shift Orbital Division" on Van Gogh's starry hill, Uncle Sam's recruitment poster, Dogs Playing Poker, the Mona Lisa, The Creation of Adam, The Birth of Venus, Girl with a Pearl Earring and The Scream.

Every design is printed on our Washed Tee: 100% cotton, 250 gsm heavyweight fabric with a washed vintage finish and a relaxed unisex fit, sizes S to 5XL, three colors per design, and many also come as a lighter Soft Tee. Orders of 2 or more tees ship free in the US, and 3 or more get 15% off automatically. See every design in the full Doberman collection.

FAQ

Do these Doberman shirts run true to size?

Yes. The Washed Tee is true to size with a relaxed straight cut; size down for a closer fit. See our size guide.

Why are Dobermans called velcro dogs?

Dobermans were bred to work closely beside one person, and most stay strongly attached to their family. Following you everywhere, leaning on you and wanting to share the couch are all part of that bond.

Is there a deal on more than one tee?

Yes. 2 or more tees ship free in the US, and 3 or more tees get 15% off automatically at checkout.